Motivation Monday ~ September 19, 2011 ~ Can Open and Honest Dialogue Help Save Us?

Sept. 18, 2011 - PRLog -- Motivation Monday, September 19, 2011 ~ Over the past decade I have traveled to almost every state in America.  I have found that outside of the major cities, Americans are very similar.  Whether they are from upstate New York or the Midwest or even out west.  The “fly-over states” as some snobs refer to them.

On my most recent trip to Arizona, I met Antwon and Pat from Atlanta.  Antwon is an African American man in his 50’s that grew up in New Orleans, which he referred to as the “6th borough of NYC.”   Pat, his wife, is an African America woman from Ft. Lauderdale.  They were celebrating their 30th Anniversary at the resort where we were staying.

The most interesting thing was the immediate connection we all shared.  Two African Americans from the “deep South” and an Irish American from New York and yet, there were seemingly no boundaries.  We spoke of golf, weather, life, love, children and well, the challenges associated with being black in America.  I am still awestruck by the openness, honesty and beauty of our discussion.

We just “connected.”  Is it that easy?  When we communicate with others and come from a genuinely honest and unthreatened place..is that what makes the difference?  Golf and weather are easy discussions and are frequently spoken about between strangers, but as we turned the conversation about more personal things and discussed family and children and the difficulties of raising children.  We discussed our concerns about raising children, as involved parents that were actively involved in our children’s lives…it became apparent that it didn’t matter if they were white, black or blue kids, we shared the view of the world as concerned parents.

As someone that travels the country speaking for a living, I speak with a lot of people, so, in this instance, I have to give Antwon all of the credit.  From the moment he came to the table next to mine, he referred to me as “bro.”  I am someone that refers to other men as “bro” frequently, regardless of skin color, although sometimes I have to admit that there might be a slight discomfort or a look of disapproval.

Antwon is a contractor from Atlanta and has “learned how to enjoy life” as he stated.  His honesty and ease created an environment of trust and openness.  He had no heirs or attitude nor did he have a tone in his voice or accent, which enabled us to connect as men from a similar generation with a similar view of the world.  In this case, we seemed to have more in common than not in common.

I recently saw the movie, “The Help,” which is about a young white woman that communicates with a group of African America women that were housemaids in Mississippi in the 50’s and 60’s.  I think it should be mandatory for every American child to go see.  The history is important, but more important is how open and honest communication changed their lives and their community.

Motivation Mondays© is dedicated to helping Americans “become the very best U that U can be” and to “take action to make things happen©.”  I understand that so many Americans are struggling to live right now and the main focus is trying to survive, however, as I have asked in weeks past, I ask each person reading this to think a little differently.  What would happen if we were all open and honest in our communication with others, like Antwon?  What if we all removed our heirs and attitudes when we spoke to others?  Would America be a different place?  Would we become closer to being a “color blind” society?

Whether you’re a white, first generation, Irish American that has been raised in a dysfunction environment or a black man that has been raised in the brutal deep south in the 60’s, as Antwon and I agreed, we have all had to face challenges and burdens.  We have all had to overcome some injustice or things that seem “unfair.”  As Antwon said… “Life’s not fair.”

My conversation with Antwon and Pat made it clear to me that we as concerned parents and Americans share more in common than we realize.  It is time for us all to find that “common ground.”  Find the things that we agree on and focus on them.  Lets not focus on those things that divide us and create friction, anger and debate, but rather the things that we can all agree on as concerned parents and citizens.

I thank God for meeting Antwon and Pat and the moment in our lives where we connected.  I wish you have a similar experience soon and it impacts your life just as deeply.  It’s your choice!