Are You Going as a Drama Queen for Halloween?

Oct. 22, 2010 - PRLog -- Dr. Susan Fletcher explains what it means to be a Drama Queen and how to eliminate negative mental theater.

Here are examples of destructive forms of mental theater:
 
-  In a work environment, a manager may perceive that his boss is upset with him because he doesn't make eye contact with him while they are talking. So the manager proceeds to relate to his boss as if there really is a disagreement.

-  An assistant may believe that a co-worker who is whispering is talking about her behind her back.  The assistant then becomes hostile as if there has been a breach of trust.

-  A husband may believe that his wife is having an affair because she is too friendly with the attractive gentleman next door.  He then begins to treat her as if she's been unfaithful.

When we only have part of the story, we tend to fill in other parts.  It's like putting a puzzle together and when you get stumped you pick up the box to see the picture so you can figure out where the pieces go.  But what if you only have half the picture?  It's like having half the story.  

Ask yourself these 4 questions to work in the Smart Zone and course correct negative drama that can get out of hand.  

1.  Is my thinking based on fact?
2.  Does my thinking help me achieve my goal?
3.  Does my thinking help me feel the way I want to feel?
4.  How can I change my mental theater to create a win-win situation?

When I asked my Facebook friends how not to be a Drama Queen or King, Deidra Roe said, "if you truly want to be heard, then stop throwing a temper tantrum and be a civilized, calm adult because no one hears a word you say when you are screaming and ranting."

Keep in mind that YOU are in charge of your own mental theater. When you have only part of a story resist the urge to fill in the blanks.  Or use mental theater to your advantage by visualizing your success and filling in the blanks with a positive outcome.

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Susan Fletcher, Ph.D. is a practicing psychologist & speaker on Emotional Intelligence, productivity, performance & leadership development. She is the author of Working in the Smart Zone (2008) & Parenting in the Smart Zone (2005).