 Research Led Couple to Natural Family Planning, Away from the PillHaving used the birth control pill, Nick and Monica Warren researched birth control extensively and decided to use Natural Family Planning.
* * * Monica: Right before we got married we attended the Engaged Encounter where we learned that the Catholic Church recommended NFP. Nick’s parents had used NFP (the mucus-only method) but I had never heard of it. So we went ahead and took a NFP class. It was the Creighton method. Even though we had a doctor meeting with us to teach us, we never fully understood it and were not confident using it. We were concerned about the limitations it placed on when we could have sex and we didn’t want anything to interfere with the spontaneity. So when we got married we used the Pill. The doctor said it would be a good idea for me to be on the Pill since I had endometriosis in the past, so I figured we could justify using it because a doctor recommended it. Nick: I didn’t like the idea of putting artificial hormones into Monica’s body because I heard it was bad for her and I was also impacted by some of the side effects she was experiencing. Monica: When we decided it was time to start having kids, we went off the Pill and got pregnant pretty easily after waiting the recommended three months. We found that we are pretty fertile. We wanted three kids and decided to space them at about a year and a half, so that’s what we did. We remembered some of our Creighton training so we were able to time the pregnancies. When we had our third child, Paula, we wanted a more permanent way to control our fertility. By this time in our marriage, sex was important, but not magical. We had settled into some routines and the romantic spark wasn’t really there. Nick: I like to research stuff…to death. So we decided that I would research contraceptives and sterilization methods to see what would be best for us. We also prayed together that I would be led to find the best option that was consistent with God’s plan for us. I found all sorts of tables and charts about various methods and their effectiveness and side effects. I looked at each one on its own. Many of those tables also listed some form of NFP. So I included it in my analysis. Remember that we had been exposed to the Creighton method of NFP seven years earlier but had decided not to use it. What’s interesting at this point is that I discovered that there were other NFP methods and that I found in the charts, the Rhythm method, hadn’t been taught for about 30 years. Google led me to Humanae Vitae, one of the Church’s official teachings written in the 1960s by Pope Paul VI. I remember printing it out and then settling into bed one night to read for a few minutes while Monica finished brushing her teeth. The document blew me away. It made a very good argument for NFP and discussed the benefits to married couples of using NFP. Not only that, but it clearly said that NFP is the only family planning method that is morally accepted by the Catholic Church. By the time Monica finished getting ready for bed, I knew that we needed to give NFP a second try. We decided to try NFP more out of obedience to the Catholic teachings than our own will. Looking in retrospect, it was obedience that was not easy in the beginning but has now paid us back tenfold. Then we had to find an NFP method that worked for us. So I did more research and found that there are four different NFP methods that are taught today: Creighton, Billings, sympto-thermal, and LAM (which is basically the natural infertility that comes with exclusive breastfeeding) Monica: During that time I was still nursing Paula and hadn’t fully returned to fertility. We realized quickly that we needed some help with our charts, so we signed up for a CCL NFP class. The sympto-thermal method was simpler to understand and we picked it up quickly. By the third class I felt confident with my observations and Nick was comfortable knowing when I was fertile or not. We were “confident” Nick: The biggest surprise is what started to happen in our marriage after we started using NFP. I started to feel more in synch with Monica. By that, I mean that we wanted to have sex around the same time. We also started to enjoy our sex life a lot more. Monica was more responsive and she was in the mood often. Not just a little bit more, but a lot more frequently. In fact, I read a research study that showed that this is common for couples who use NFP. Monica: Nick also started to see small things in my cycle that led us to understand that I had a micro nutrient deficiency. We were able to address it with vitamins and natural nutrients. Nick can see in my charts when I am sick or under stress. Nick: Another benefit we experienced when using NFP is that a romantic spark returned to our love life. This came about because of the brief period that we choose to abstain each month. The method doesn’t say when you can and can’t have sex. The method just tells you when you’re fertile. If you have sex during that time, you are likely to get pregnant. If you only have sex in the infertile time, you won’t get pregnant. We abstain about 12 days each month. Abstinence has actually been very good for our love life. It’s a time of huge buildup in preparation for that night that we are infertile again. We flirt a good amount during that buildup time and it’s great. I can show Monica that I love her for more than just great sex. It can be difficult abstaining but it is a sacrifice I make to show Monica how much I respect her as a person. Monica: Another benefit for us is that we started to talk more about sex and planning our family. We talked about whether we wanted more kids. In fact, we still have this discussion regularly. Sometimes I want more kids and he doesn’t and sometimes he wants more kids and I don’t. But for now we’ve decided to hold off. Nick: There are many other benefits for me as a man that I never imagined. The biggest benefit came from being around a woman who is cycling normally. I think it’s the pheromones. We were so surprised about the changes that NFP brought to our marriage that we decided to get certified to teach so we could share all the blessings we have received with other couples. To us it’s like NFP is one of the best kept secrets and we want to help you get as much out of it as we have. * * * Sign up for a membership at Couple to Couple League International at www.ccli.org, and receive “Family Foundations.” Natural Family Planning Classes Taught Classes in Natural Family Planning are taught in 17 locations in the Chicago metro area, including southeast Wisconsin and northeast Indiana. The next series of classes will begin Sunday, Aug. 29, 2010 at 6 pm at St. Irene Church in Warrenville, IL, taught by Mike and Denise Kenealy. The method taught is the Sympto-Thermal Method, and it is also taught via CylePRO software. To register, and for a list of classes throughout the U.S., go to CCL International at www.ccli.org, (800) 745-8252. Chicago area NFP information is at www.naturalfamilyplanningchicago.com. # # # The Couple to Couple League (CCL) is an international, Catholic, non-profit organization dedicated to teaching Natural Family Planning (NFP) to married and engaged couples. This news article is sponsored by the Chicago chapter of CCL International. End
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