Discordian Society Finishes Renovations in Limbo. Eris approves new bible series.

Nov. 19, 2010 - PRLog -- After what seemed like an eternity, the residents of Limbo watched passively as the final touches of the long awaited renovations of their plane were finished today. After the ribbon cutting ceremony this morning, at a press conference held in the new corporate center, Avatar and Spokesman for Eris Esoteric, Davz Not Here said, “I assume everyone by now has noticed that it’s a bit brighter here on Limbo now. We think going with a light gray color scheme vs. the dark gray color scheme will help us utilize a little more of our planes natural lighting. Now we have heard people, spirits, and lost aliens alike speak out against this kind of green minded thinking. They want to say there is no room for green in Limbo. Eris, and I, not to mention several experts in Art Theory have all come to agree that thinking green will not alter the gray scale tone of the land. We want assure everyone that this kind of progress will not affect the plane of Limb in any negative ways.”

Later in the speech Davz announced some of the new homesteading options that have been opened to the residents of Limbo. “With the fixes we’ve made to the subjective directional gravity pockets of the plane, essentially cordoning off areas and imposing normalized gravity in those areas, we have opened the door for residents to go claim a little piece of Limbo to call their own. This provides, what appear to be many thousands of kilometers for new living space. We have also started to catalog the areas of Limbo where elements of rock and dirt and such have collected. As you know in limbo we have those annoying random element collectives, Earth, Air, Fire, and Water pockets that just kind of float around randomly pop in and out etc. They are one of the biggest chaos creators on the plane. So during our renovation research we stumbled upon a secret way of binding the earth pockets. We feel this will, with interfering with the planes natural chaos field and further down the road, provide even more available living space. I mean look around, Limbos population is growing at an incredible rate. We're also looking at real estate in some of the surrounding planes as well. I mean this is the time to buy.

There are other changes coming, not in Limbo, but in the Discordian Religion itself. “Seems like ‘chaos’ has become a little bit normalized,” Davz said, “The first thing Eris and I looked at was the newest, 5th edition of, Principia Discordia. It was funny in a way, but it seemed to Eris, and I just happen to agree, that it was like watching a stoner movie. If you have seen one you have seen them all. Same old jokes, repainted of coarse but really no different that the last one. So, Eris was recently reading some R.A Salvatore book about dark elves or some silly thing and was particularly intrigued by how a deity from the book named Lloth, became frustrated with the path her followers were following (in her name)and did something to shake up the status quot, she started a war among her own followers. Eris had been feeling the same way about the bulk of her popes, but thought that to inadvertently cause a war (remember the Trojan War?) might some way be avoided while still causing a major shake up among the flock.” Davz added, “I and some of the other folks from the Eris Esoteric Sound Lab are getting together over the next few months to write the new and official Discordian Bible. The new bible will be the New, Modern and Updated American Language bible. Eris is directly involved in this one and will be overseeing most of the project. We also through the grace of Eris have access to Robert Anton Wilson’s consciousness field, which is currently enjoying a well earned vacation in the Orion Nebulae. I myself am looking very forward to the communing; Robert was one of Eris’ most proficient popes, I hope to learn many things from the trip and our visit with his consciousness field.” As expected, Eris herself will remain Editor in Chief of this project. “The main goal here will be, more than anything, to stop the flow of tripe in the name of Eris. Just like in the Art world, any yahoo loser living in moms basement can put two rusty cans on a string and throw some paint at it, then turn around, call it art and sell it to the masses. The same sort of thing has been going on inside the Discordian Society Religious Sects for about 10 years now, and most of the time we’re ok with this, everyone needs to make a buck, but Eris has stated many times that she sees some of the older popes as corrupted, not willing to share their success in support of or with the up and coming popes, consolidating their power bases and printing material that is out dated.”

As with any change, no matter how subtle they are enacted, there will be those of opposing opinion. Protesters were on hand to make sure that opinion was seen. One Protester, who looked very similar to Omar Kayam, but wished to remain anonymous said, “We tried to get Stephen Colbert to join our cause, there were scheduling issues and he was a little more enthusiastic then we of the old Limbo were really ready to deal with. It seemed almost counter productive to have that much fervor behind a movement intent on keeping the status quo. We also heard he did some promo work for the Discordian Society a few years back and we were concerned about a conflict of interests. In the end we decided that the best way to get people to understand our point was to live it.” And live it they did. Milling about aimlessly, incongruously mumbling unintelligible one line slogans, holding various editions of Principia Discordia high in the air (about shoulder height in Limbo). They braved the gray skies to make themselves heard, or at least seen since they really were rather quiet, compared to some protests this reporter has covered.

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The Discordian Society, is an eclectic combination of funk, jazz and rock, with influences that range from Zappa and John Zorn, to Jaco Pastorius and Les Claypool.