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Heaven Is Finally Found
In his forthcoming book, February The Fifth, author and satirist Derek Haines claims he has proven heaven is real. It's hiding just behind Jupiter.
In an odd twist of fate, he then discovered an odd connection between this mysterious planet, Pope Gregory XIII, Rome and backgammon. 'I just had to connect the dots,' he was quoted as saying. 'And then evolution and creation merged into one viable theory, and Gloth became the answer.' Despite his discovery occurring in the middle of a great bottle of French rosé, Haines is convinced of his new found truth. 'It's so logical.'
Although many have already scoffed, Haines is unrepentant and is looking forward to the official release date of his new book. February The Fifth on 5th of February. 'The truth will come out. No matter how true it is,' he said. 'I just hope that people understand that satirical writers don't normally go to all the trouble of finding a new and hidden planet to attract a faithful readership. This must be an astronomical achievement.'
'February The Fifth' is available now on Amazon in paperback and Kindle.
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Derek Haines is an author of fiction, historical fiction, essays and poetry. Born in Australia, but now living in Switzerland, his stories cross a wide geographical range but often draw from his life and experiences in the two countries he calls home.
Page Updated Last on: Jan 20, 2011