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Follow on Google News | Climate Negotiations Seek To Regulate New Area Of Farm Animal Effluence EmissionsAt the forthcoming conference on climate control where countries will discuss an extention to the kyoto Accord, a new resolution is being seriously discussed to cap and monitor the emissions of farm animal bio-gas emission levels.
By: United micronations on Climate Control At the forthcoming conference on climate control where countries will discuss an extension to the current Kyoto Accord, a new resolution is being seriously discussed to cap and monitor the emissions of farm animal bio-gas emission levels. Farm animal effluence are one of the biggest contributors to CO2 emissions in the agriculture industry according to enviromentalists and scientists have developed new techniques used to reduce the smelly and harmful effects of annimal farts. One such technique developed by the Farming univerity of New Zeland is bio-effluance combustion of the dispelled bio-gas as they are emitted from the animal' rear. However, field trials on cows using this method were only partially succssful as several cows caught fire and were roasted alive. Farners noted that they were able to sell the carcass direct to hungry customers and invadvertantly discovered a new efficent process of production in roast beef. Scientists also found that cows can be induced to produce more bio-gas from the sheer feer of seeing a low yielding cow turned into instant roast beef by farmers if they did not produce enough bio-gas. " Survival of the fartiest - commented one farmer". Another carbon emission reduction system has been developed by carbon trading consultants, Leavem Broker Advisors. They have recently implemented for the Egyptian government a new regional emissions trading scheme called Farm Animals effluence Reduction Treaty (FART). Similar to other cap and trade schemes, FART awards farmers credits that are able to capture bio-gas from their live-stocks' and FART credits are financially transferrable to farms that are unable to stop their live-stocks from farting. Leavem Broker Advisors believes that an active financial market for FART credits is feasible and are already devising derivatives such as FART futures, FART options and FART swaps. Major European emission control exchanges have shown enthusiasim for the scheme as it adds more hot air to the list of products already traded. Leavem brokers believes that their model of cap and trade is benifical to all parties. Famers are subsidised for capturing natural cow farts which supplements the normal income of producing milk and dairy produce. Consumers benefit from lower meat prices as low yielding cows can be instantly be exterminated by farmers using the new rear-combustion and live roasting method giving instant roast beef. And for the productive cows who are able to emitt the most bio-gas, farmers will keep them as their bi-product is now virtually a cash-cow. END OF PRESS RELEASE End
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