Black Men Subjected To "The Talk" For Survival (Part I)

ST. LOUIS - Oct. 29, 2014 - PRLog -- Being a black man in America is not for the weak, in fact, I can’t think of another group of men that would be able to withstand the torment that we face daily. If we base the expectation on what the media and society has prewritten, then the story is bleak.

Let’s see, where shall we begin? First of all, society has changed, and many black men are born into this world to a young mother who might not know who daddy is, or if she does, there is a chance that he might not be sticking around. As a child, black men sometime have to be aware of the crazy boyfriends that mom is bringing home, and let’s pray to GOD that this fool does not like little boys.

As black men grow up, they witness many of their friends turning to gangs, illegal activity, and drug use. Mind you that sometimes dad is not there to guide them, so it’s hard to avoid the peer pressure, so more than likely they will have a few run in’s with the law before age 18. Oh yeah, moms is at work trying to make ends meet, and the drug trade is looking real good right now. I need a new pair of shoes and those Air Jordan’s are calling my name.  After all, I’m tired of getting picked on by the rest of the kids at school, and that chick that sits in front of me at school wouldn’t give a broke brother like me the time of day. Mom could use the extra money too, so she won’t care where I got the money from.

By the time black men reach 25 (full grown), more than likely there will be babies, baby mama(s), and oh yeah, child support. Many black men can’t keep a steady girlfriend, why, because mom didn’t keep a steady boyfriend. Dad wasn’t there to show them how to treat a woman. They can’t keep hustling, so it’s time to get a job, a real job. Who’s going to hire a  young black with a record and a GED, certainly not a company that pays more than minimum wage?  Hell, even with a college education, it’s hard for most of us to get a good job. When we walk into that interview, the probable white interviewer is scoping us out from head to toe. They are looking at my hair, my complexion, and listening to the way I talk. If it’s a black person interviewing a black person, they are worse than the white guy. You know the type of black person that grew up in the suburbs, went to college, and made straight A’s in school. Even if we get the job, we have to deal with glass ceilings, because it’s only so high up they are going to let black people rise.

When a black man reaches his thirties, he is normally tired of the struggles, pain, and is seeking stability. Yeah I got tired of the different girls, going to the club and had the desire to have a loving family. When it’s time to meet that special someone, where do you go to find her. Many women are scarred, have attitudes, and have better jobs than us. How can I be a man in my house when my wife is making more than me, and every day she is telling me how much she does not need a man and can take care of herself. Even if we did meet a good woman, we wouldn’t know how to treat her due to our childhood, and some insecurities. In the life of a black man, we often rotate jobs and women as if they were tires on a car. I forgot about the biggest problem of all…We are black.

It’s like we were doomed since birth. The race that makes up the majority not only never liked us, but now see’s us as fools. The only thing we have ever been good for in the eyes of the majority is work. Yeah, America loves the Kobe’s, the LeBron’s, and the Mj’s (both of the Michaels and Magic) because they are making them money. When you are making America money by entertaining, playing a sport, or even acting, you will be ok. If you are just the average Joe, or should I say Leroy, you will have to fight your way through this life harder than the average man.

A black man wants and deserves the same opportunities as any other man. We want the good jobs, we want the pretty wife and kids, and we want the vacations to Disney world and a few dogs with the picket fence. The problem is that America as a whole does not and has never wanted to see us with it, and some of our own people don’t either. Many of our black men are in jail, and many of our youth are headed there. Why do you ask?  It’s not because black men want to be unsuccessful, it’s because America was designed this way. As a black man in America, I make no excuses at all, but I give reasons. We can go to school and get the same education as the rest of the world, we can also stay out of jail in most situations, but we have to be taught to first love ourselves.

We have been taught that we are nothing, and have no value. This is something that we have been stripped of, and that’s why we need more real black leaders, not the opportunistic once we have now. Being a black man is something that I love, but being one in America can make you want to just avoid all of your responsibilities, which is killing us but we have to do better.

John Parker is a senior public relations and marketing professional, and President of Parker Public Relations in St. Louis, MO. He well experienced in crisis, situational, and executive communications, and public affairs with over 15 years of diverse experience in media relations, political operations and connecting individuals and corporations with the world through communications.