Kenneth Stepp, "What Love Does"

April 8, 2014 - PRLog -- By: Kenneth Stepp

What on Earth would make me think I could write about a subject this size? Well. Nothing in the broad view. I just do not have that kind of time, energy, or visions of grandeur. However. I do have personal experiences. I suppose I can attest to those. Or, at least give it a shot. So, hang in there for a few words, let me see if I can unpack that in a way that makes sense.

I have written so often about my rebound relationship until I have just about ran out of words. It was intense. And I never recovered fully. Why? Because, I fell in love and never “unfell”. This caused me to study love and what it might be. To understand love is to understand everything for me. You see. I want that forever thing the Hallmark cards talk so much about. Because of this goal. My quest is to understand everything there is to know about love. What I have found has been so enlightening to me. My hope is that it helps you too. If not. Remember and use it later.

For those that proclaim undying love for someone, yet in ten years it’s hard to remember that person’s name. This isn’t really for you. For those that still hang onto the memory of a partner twenty years ago. You will get this completely.  You see. Love never stops. It never goes away. It endures forever. Love is eternal. The saddest thing I have learned is that seldom is real love shared by two people. One does, the other just says. Big difference. Not that there is necessarily anything nefarious going on. No doubt. Those that utter the words “I love you”, actually believe the words coming out of their mouths at that moment. They just can’t pass the test of time. Among other tests, of course.

The last meaningful conversation I had with my rebound relationship was confusing. I saw her on a dating site. It crushed me. I sent her an email. That was lame of course. But, we had a chat. She had a “life event” that changed the direction of her life. To this day, I have no idea what that event was. Only that it exists. For this reason. She no longer wants a forever relationship.  Just someone to go places with. You know. On some level, I get that. It was helpful to me to know that. Not sure why. It simply was. I backed away, I’d say, forever. But, forever hasn’t happened yet.

My very best friend on this wonderful planet is unique. Several decades ago, we lived together, and were engaged. We just never made it down the aisle. Today. She is one of the few people I truly love unconditionally. I told her about this “event” in my rebound relationship’s life. Her response floored me. She said. What she didn’t understand is that she had a man that would stick with her no matter what. A man that would support her, hold her through the most terrible of times. A man that would never leave or turn from her.

This coming from the person that knows me better than anyone made me silent for several moments (a miracle). She was right. It would not matter because I loved her with my whole heart. Unconditional love has the power to heal, to comfort, to serve, and to do all of this gladly. It affected me to hear these words from her. I am changed for life, not simply because I fell in love completely. But because it was confirmed by the person that knew me better than anyone.

Unconditional love, when observed by someone that doesn’t have the same capacity to love seems fake, silly, or even foolish. To them, it is just so odd, they can’t grasp what it means. Real love has become so diluted as man “progresses”. I believe some, if not most, have evolved to the point that they no longer have the ability to allow real love in.

As the romantic component in this love fades. And the real love remains. I find myself longing for that intensity I had with my rebound relationship once again. The good news is that I now know I am emotionally available again. This is very new. Actually something I did not know I could do again. Yet I find myself getting a glimpse of it again. Wow! I have no idea where I will be down the road a ways. But, I know now that I can move on. One day I hope I can explain this in greater detail. I’m not great at writing in abstract. I like details when I write. But understanding all this will take much more time for me.

Remember to pursue love and love alone. It heals the body and soul, it calms, it repairs lives, it creates trust and detracts evil and pain. Go for it. What do you really have to lose? Is your life perfect? Of course not. Love someone and through it all out there. It’s so worth it.

k@kstepp.com