“We love our Janine Driver!” said Natalie Morales, Today Show News Anchor, New York, NY “We’ve been getting emails all morning about how excited everyone is to see Janine on the segment.” Willie Geist, Today Show Co-Anchor, New York, NY, confirmed Morales statement by restating, “We love Janine!”
Now ask yourself, "Am I likable?" As you might imagine, your likability could effect how your bosses and co-workers treat you. Believe it or not it can also affect your everyday interactions. According to Driver, "There’s a lot of problems we have with what we think makes us likable which in fact makes us not likable."
--Eye Contact -How much is appropriate?
“The biggest problem with eye contact is people are actually overdoing it," Driver explained. "In the United States of America to be likable, you have to give about 60% eye contact and avoid looking at someone's forehead, which is seen as intimidating and only look at the other person's lips when you want to send a sexual message.
The fix: Along with using 60% eye contact, Driver added that to be likable, we should look in the "Upside Down Triangle," which is from the eyebrows to the nose.
--Natural Smile - Forms/disappears slowly, a natural easy smile.
According to Driver some of us come into a room and smile ear to ear and that hurts our first impression.
The fix: Make someone feel special and smile when you hear the person's name. As if they made you smile and in return they'll flash their pearly whites back at you!
--Avoiding Aggressive Hand Gestures – Palm-Down and Steeling hand gestures with peers.
“I’m not a big fan of the Palm-Down gesture; if I said to Al ‘How was your vacation to Aruba?’ while gesturing with your palms down, you might as well be saying ‘We like you better in Aruba!’” Said Driver, “I like steepling but when you steeple people, you intimidate people. Donald Trump can do it, Oprah Winfrey can do it, but if you are doing this on a date or when first meeting someone it really hurts rapport. You might as well come out with your middle finger scratching your forehead.”
The fix: Use open-palm-up gestures when speaking to increase your likability factor fast.
-- Universal Micro-Expressions– Facial tells with anger and contempt.
Anger – “When we don’t like what we see or hear, our lips disappear; this is anger," explained Driver. You will see this with notorious liars or someone who is holding something back – their lips disappear.
The fix: "Put your tongue behind your top teeth and smile when you're angry," Driver explained. "This will loosen those lips and wrinkle your eyes and you'll appear more approachable."
Contempt – Contempt is a smirk off to one side of the face; it is moral superiority. “With contempt relationships are actually 80% more likely to end in divorce,” Driver said. "It’s dangerous!"
The fix: When listening to others, smile and tilt your head to the side, and you'll appear to be empathetic, Driver explained back stage.
For more information on how to hire Janine Driver as YOUR next keynote speaker or to invite Janine to be YOUR media guest and/or to interview Janine contact Krysta Hill, Body Language Institute’s Director of Communications - information provided below.
See the Today Show segment here:
Director of Communications
Janine Driver & The Body Language Institute