Diversity of relationships is intrinsic to human nature, as can be seen in the most primitive tribal societies as well as the most advanced human societies. Relationships can be broadly divided into two groups i.e. congenital and acquired. Congenital relationships may also be designated as inherited or historical relationships being determined by birth. Acquired relationships can be further divided into social relationships and friendships. Social relationships may be determined by matrimonial relationship or place of residence, education and work. Friendships are the relationships of our own choice generally determined by companionship and mutual commitment. Friendship is more than meeting of interest or acquaintance. It implies emotional bonding and mutual concern.
All relationships are dynamic in character. Dynamism is more in the case of social relations and friendships. Scope and limits or nature and depth can profoundly vary from time to time. Relationships may also be viewed as non-negotiated unwritten contracts among people resting upon assurance of mutual help and concern in case of some need. But relationships are neither a trade nor barter. However all relationships are governed by some rules of relationship some of which may even be recognized by law. Relationships of the kind recognized by law may be called as legally determined relationships. If there is a mandatory legal procedure prescribed for constitution of a legally determined relationship, then the procedure must be complied with to constitute a legal and valid relationship.
What is common to all relationships is the rule that in any relationship, rules of relationship prevail over individual interest. One such rule is that in a partnership mutual interest prevails over individual interest. Companionship, love, respect etc. help sustain a relationship. But what really matters is compliance with rule of relationship whether by the sheer force of commitment or love or respect etc.
All relationships are liable to turn sour due to various reasons. One reason being that people tend to comply with relationships because of emotional reasons and ones emotional compulsions vanish or better sentimental alternatives become available, the existing relationship turns sour. Other important reasons are vagueness of assurance, promise or rule underlying any relationship;
Therefore, either people are exploited in the name of relationship or lose faith in relationships. The end result is the psychological inability to establish appropriate relationship or fear of relationships. Even this is not an acceptable situation because need for relationships is an intrinsic need and one finds it difficult to lead life all alone.
Solution to the situation lies in understanding role of our relations in our emotional and physical existence, clearly understanding rules underlying different relationships and honest compliance with the rules. We should live our relationships prudently and pragmatically. Let our egocentricity or selfishness not spoil our relationships. At the same time if somebody is abusing a relationship, an exhaustive attempt should be made to make the abuser mend his ways but if the abuser is found to be incorrigible after exhaustive efforts, then a decision to end the particular relationship should be considered. Relationships should not be victims of our temper tantrums or whims and fancies. We need our relations as much as we need food, clothing and shelter, if not for material reasons, at least for our emotional wellbeing.
Author: Dr Mahesh C. Jain is a practicing medical doctor has written the book “Encounter of Science with Philosophy – A synthetic view”. The book begins with first chapter devoted to scientifically valid concept of God and then explains cosmic phenomena right from origin of nature and universe up to origin of life and evolution of man. The book includes several chapters devoted to auxiliary concepts and social sciences as corollaries to the concept of God. This is the only book which deals with origin of nature and universe from null or Zero or nothing. The book contains two chapters devoted to law and justice respectively.