HOW SANTA QUIT SMOKING 2012
Since the release of the poem A Visit From St. Nicholas (1823), popularized as Twas The Night Before Christmas, it has become well known that Santa smokes a pipe. 2012 I have gone smoke free, gone is the pipe. Now I want to set things right.
Why I choose to quit smoking in 2012?
Over the summer I was catching up on my reading and notice news stories that shook me right down to the ends of my red striped socks.
In November 2011 The UK Dept. of Health reported that children had told researchers that their number one Christmas wish was for their parents to stop smoking, they would give up Christmas presents if it helped to get their parents to butt out. This was the first time that I had heard that they were willing to forgo presents if it would make a difference. No presents equates to no need for Santa. My quitting was put on red alert.
I read the USA Surgeon General`s 2012 Report that showed smoking rates were no longer in decline and pipe smoking has gone up by a staggering 573% from 2008 - Center for Disease Control Statistic
Furthermore the elves heard parents say that they were skipping over lines of the Twas poem to prevent kids being upset or influenced by the depiction of Santa puffing away.
I asked the elves to search for the best tricks to quitting. To my dismay they came back with the fact that over 90% of people succeed in quitting by going cold turkey. I had tried cold turkey and failed. I had tried other methods and also failed miserably. Harvard studies released in 2012 announced once again the disappointing results of Nicotine Replacement Therapy.
``If the success rate for cold turkey is 3.4%, how did over 90% of quitters achieve success? “The elves giggled as they love trick questions. ``It took on average 5.6 attempts, Santa you need to try cold turkey again.” That is how I quit smoking.
My Christmas wish to you is to give it another go and get this done once and for all.
Grafton and Scratch - publishers Twas The Night Before Christmas edited by Santa Claus for the benefit of children of the 21st. century, 2012
604 563-0055 Vancouver, BC Canada
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