"I was just sitting in Loogie's Diner, and all of a sudden, this man with wild eyes sat down in our booth and started preaching of ufo's and alien abductions. It was freaky," recites Chuck Splatter, local resident and Loogie's Diner regular, reciting his run-in with an actual eye witness. There are testimonies that even claim that resident, Troy Slushy, had been abducted, and that he was exposed to a secret plot of an alien invasion.
"Yes ma'am. Troy Slushy indeed approached me, warning me about this abduction, and everything else the aliens had done to him, and what their purpose was. It was freaky," recites Doink McTriggers, local panderer.
The factual credibility of these resources is unknown, but regardless, with Wilsie McHickoryboob's quick wit and investigative instincts, intriguing conclusions have undoubtedly been made.
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