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Follow on Google News | Cash 4 Gold Offers $240 Billion for U.S. Gold ReservesCash4Gold, America’s # 1 buyer of precious metals direct from the general public has announced an offer to buy the America’s national gold reserve for the price of $240 billion.
By: Brad Smith Cash 4 Gold learned of the Obama Administration’ Appearing on The Onion to explain the government’s plan to work with Cash4Gold (http://www.theonion.com/ Cash4Gold is paying an additional 20 percent on all items received before July 4 as part of a current promotional campaign called the Cash4Gold Gold Rush (http://www.marketwire.com/ The plan to sell the federal gold reserve was the brainchild of Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner, who apparently came up with the idea after seeing a Cash4Gold commercial on television, the Onion reported. “Cash4Gold has helped hundreds of thousands of Americans monetize their broken or unwanted jewelry, and we certainly stand ready to serve the American government,” Cash4Gold also offered Treasury Secretary Geithner a seat on its Board of Advisers. “Secretary Geithner has been at center stage during recent months, working tirelessly to improve the economic situation in America,” said Aronson. “We hope that he will accept a position with Cash4Gold’s Board of Advisors, and share with us some of the insights he has gained through his unique experience.” As Deputy Treasury Secretary Kuehnel told the Onion, the U.S. plan to sell its gold to Cash4Gold has no real risk, since all transactions with Cash4Gold are fully backed by a 100 percent satisfaction guarantee. Cash4Gold customers have 12 days to call or return their checks should they decide not to accept Cash4Gold’s offer. Their goods are then returned at no cost. As it does with every all materials it receives, Cash4Gold will test the metal using the most sophisticated assaying equipment in the jewelry industry to determine the gold’s weight and purity. Cash4Gold will likely need to draw upon the efforts of every one of its 300employees to process a shipment of this size. Postal and insurance rates for such a transaction would provide a significant additional economic stimulus for the government—not to mention the cash they would get for their gold. *This is obviously satire. About Cash4Gold Cash4Gold is America’s #1 buyer of precious metals including gold, silver and platinum from the general public, and one of the largest refiners of precious metals in the nation. Hundreds of thousands of satisfied customers have received millions of dollars from Cash4Gold since its inception. Cash4Gold has warned customers that unauthorized businesses are running cash for gold scams (http://www.marketwatch.com/ *This is obviously satire. End
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